


gone, gone

by kinpika



Series: McGenji Week 2016 [5]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Adoption?, Family, M/M, McGenji Week
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-27
Updated: 2016-10-27
Packaged: 2018-08-27 08:43:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,756
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8395036
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kinpika/pseuds/kinpika
Summary: McGenji Week 2016Day Five Prompt: Family“I spent years telling myself that letting her go was the right thing to do.”





	

At first, McCree almost couldn’t tell there was something wrong. Not that he was unable to read Genji’s subtle body language, oh no. Years together now had equipped them both with handling how a lack of facial expression meant he showed what he felt in other ways. Despite Genji insisting that McCree was reading into it too much, this time he felt a little worse for not realising. 

Then again, he understood why Genji didn’t want him to realise.

Sitting on the bench, McCree watched as several younger children passed his hat around, doing their best impersonations of what he assumed was supposed to be him. It was fine, of course, as it distracted them from the surroundings, if only for a moment. In his arms, one of the younger ones was asleep, and there was an itch in him for a smoke, but he ignored it.

If anything, he kept his eyes trained on Genji, how he stood apart from them, arms crossed. Normally, he was a hit with kids. Something about old tv shows playing all the time had infatuated an entire generation with robots, and Genji being a self proclaimed ‘cyborg ninja dude’ definitely excited them. 

McCree didn’t want to push him. He didn’t _like_ pushing Genji for conversation. But he hands over the sleeping girl to one of the workers, and steps closer, trying to figure out what to say. How to approach the topic. Not that anything in the universe had trained him for broaching the topic of children, let alone either of theirs. Genji may not have always been the way he was at that moment, something he liked to remind McCree of, frequently, sometimes with a coy wink, but it was still disconcerting to imagine. 

Likewise, McCree was sure Genji felt the same, when thinking about him. Especially in those years apart when Overwatch was disbanded, McCree was no stranger to human contact. He confessed to it, even, when Genji had asked one day. Though he was sure to emphasis on wearing protection, being safe, making sure nothing happened, there was always that lingering doubt. 

And well, Genji’s lingering doubt was only a few yards away.

“You alright?” McCree asks, lighting a cigarillo once he deems himself a safe distance away from the kids. Hell hath no fury like a child worker, he’s realised, the last time he was anywhere near one of the buildings. Lesson learnt. 

“Fine.” Let it be known that, for a cyborg ninja dude, Genji was the worst liar. Even with a visor, McCree knew he was lying through his teeth, and nudged him in the shoulder for good measure. How he got so far in life was beyond McCree.

“No, you’re not. Talk to me, sweetheart.”

A huff leaves Genji, that sets off jets of steam, even. Deeply frustrated, or annoyed, or angered, or _something_. And he refused to tell McCree what it was. This was one of those times that McCree wished Zenyatta joined them, even if he had no idea where the omnic was ever looking. Or just how much he knew. At least he always got Genji to talk, and work through whatever was bothering him, instead of bottling it up until the next round of bad guys to beat up.

McCree was sure that working through feelings continually like that was going to wind up with one or both of them in an impossible situation one day, and he wanted to avoid that for as long as possible. “Genji, come on. Talk.”

Silent, but only for a moment. “I… have realised something.”

Despite wanting to press Genji further, McCree remains as silent as he can.

“The past does ‘catch up’ with you eventually, doesn’t it?”

Genji was focused on one particular child at the orphanage. A girl, going on into her teens. McCree felt for her, as she was one of the first ones who had offered to help move the smaller children when the fighting broke out. It was strange, as she had remained unusually calm during the entire process, and McCree may not have been the smartest man in the universe, but he was able to put two and two together. 

Lingering doubts. At least, from where he stood, the girl had Genji’s high cheekbones. But the rest must have been her mother, whoever that was. He wanted to jab his elbow into Genji’s side, and make a joke about it, but knew he couldn’t. Wanted to do it to lighten the mood, but there was so much distance from where they stood — where _Genji_ stood — and where she was, McCree was simply at a loss.

“Will you say anything?”

McCree could imagine Genji pursing his lips, debating his options. “No, I will leave her.”

“Why not?” His words tumbled out before he was able to catch them, and McCree closed his eyes at his one foot _in_ mouth problem.

“What right do I have?”

Had anyone warned him that Shimada Genji would end up being the most frustrating man McCree had ever met, he may not have believed them then. But he wished someone had warned him now. “What do you have to lose?”

“I spent years telling myself that letting her go was the right thing to do.” So Genji had known, for a while now. It just begged questions, about whose choice it was to give the child up for adoption, why Genji hadn’t reached out earlier. How he felt about being so close to his own child, in the body he was in now.

“Older children, _teenagers_ , are less likely to be adopted. Genji, I’ve _been_ in that position before.” McCree remembered a small stint at an orphanage, once upon a time. “Not a good place.”

“She seems… content.”

“Content that she will never have a family, maybe. She’ll turn eighteen, and they’ll throw her out.”

Genji makes a somewhat strangled noise, and McCree watches his most human action yet. Covering his visor with his hands, trying to hide himself away. McCree regretted his words in their entirety, and hated how he couldn’t take them back. “I cannot adopt her. It’s not right. Safe.” English slipping. McCree was losing this conversation quickly.

“I’m not asking you to. I would _never_ force that on you.” Bending a little, McCree pries Genji’s hands from his visor, staring in at the gap, where his eyes were just barely visible. “Never.”

Finally, Genji speaks up, voice oddly croaky. “You knew.”

Giving him a shrug, McCree doesn’t quite let him go, but stands up straight. “I had a feeling. Just didn’t know which one.” Lingering doubts. Realisations. Too much for one day, in between hauling ass to Hanamura to stop one thing or another.

“She’s a Shimada. I have a responsibility.”

“To _that_ family? Tell me you're joking.”

Even under his visor, McCree knew what the displeased expression on Genji’s face looked like. For a few minutes, they continued to remain silent, simply watching as she broke up a fight, helped with lunch, walked their way. Genji did not freeze up like McCree had thought he might. Instead he stared, intently, as the girl walked closer. Offering them food.

“Thank you,” McCree gets out, accent a bit too hard on his Japanese, but he gets a smile. There is Genji in her, with that show of teeth. She was bound to be a handful when older. As McCree eats, he looks out the corner of his eye as Genji accepts whatever it was that was being offered (McCree hadn’t looked as he had taken it, and wasn’t sure if he would ever get used to the food here). Perhaps that came as a shock to the girl, as her mouth falls into a questioning ‘o’, watching Genji raise the food to his visor.

Genji asks something in Japanese, that McCree wouldn’t ever be able to understand, but the girl nods, smiling again. Notices McCree staring, and he hears the slightly fractured English. Another one of those times when he wished he payed attention to Reyes’ insistence he _learns_. “I made them.”

“They’re delicious, thank you.” 

She understands, and says something to Genji again. McCree notes the surprise in his voice when he speaks. “She said one of the workers is teaching her English slowly. She apologises.”

“There’s no need to apologise.”

At the first sign of a wrinkle in her brow, Genji quickly speaks, and it’s gone. If there was any concerns from Genji about speaking to her, they did not make themselves apparent. Only when she was called back to the crowd, giving the rest of the food away, did Genji finally slump forward. “I,” he starts, but the conversation doesn’t go anywhere. That was completely fine, and McCree does what he does best — hold Genji close.

“Is that why you were in the North?” McCree finally asks, when Genji pulls away.

“I—yes. I had heard her mother had travelled and I thought…”

“You didn’t know she was here.”

“Not exactly, no.”

A pause. “What are you going to do?”

Breathing deeply, Genji finally turns to face McCree head on. “I will make sure… she is comfortable.”

“And?”

“I do not believe I can raise a child alone, Jesse.”

That manages to take McCree by surprise, and he’s not quite sure he masks the hurt in his voice. “Who said anything about being ‘alone’?”

Falling silent, Genji does not answer. Simply resumes staring, not giving anything away now. Irking McCree quite a bit, he moves to standing directly in Genji’s line of sight, enough to irritate the man until he looked up. “Lift your visor for a sec’.”

Genji compiles, just enough to expose the curve of his cheek. Pressing his lips there, McCree lingers, making sure Genji understood perfectly well. “You are _not_ alone. I am here.”

“Jesse…”

“Genji, if you want to, I will stand by you. If you want to wait, that’s fine. And if you don’t want to interfere with her life, that’s your decision too.” Finally, McCree moves back, enough space to be able to cup Genji’s cheek. “I will support you, no matter what.”

“But—”

“ _Listen_. It is up to _you_.”

Clipping his visor back in place, Genji takes a moment to simply _breathe_. It is the most stressful moment of McCree’s life, but when Genji places his hands on either side of McCree’s face, he can see that look in Genji’s eye. “Thank you.”

“What I’m here for,” McCree offers, and places his hands over Genji’s own, squeezing them gently.

**Author's Note:**

> do they adopt her in the end? well,


End file.
